feelin free and clean

Hey Everyone
Here's the latest and greatest update I have for now. Sorry I haven't posted for awhile but have been extremely busy but I'm not giving up. Sobriety has been great and I hope it is for you as well, so enjoy and be back ASAP. Take care and stay clean.
"Recovering" Ron

The Monday Blues

Good Morning to All;
I hope everyone had a good weekend. I know I did. I'm going to try something here a little different. Right now, instead of writing all this stuff out, I'm going to try and make a video and post it with this so if I get it right you'll see the video to watch and I won't have to spend an hour typing all this.since my typing skills suck. So if it works , GREAT. If not I will write more later. So away I go. Be in touch soon.... "Recovering" Ron

Great day to be clean

Hey folks;
I trust and hope everyone is doing well. After a very horrible beginning of the week, the last two days have been very humbling and good for me. On Tuesday, I woke up with a migraine headache and that was just the start for a bad few days. I don't know if any of you are familiar with those headaches, but when I get one it's usually a few day affair. They just burn me the fuck out. BAD. Friday was the first day that I was feeling back to normal but through it all, I managed to keep my head on straight and stay clean. I mean like there's this one dude at work that just pisses me off to no end, and he managed to get to me when I was feeling like shit. To the point where I'd just like to smash him in the face but I stood my ground, grinned and bared it and only bitched slightly. In the long run it was the best thing I did because instead of flying off the handle and causing more trouble for myself, he was the one in the wrong and I was right. This isn't the first time this has happened but I guess what I'm trying to get at is that by acting like a human being instead of some ragging lunatic, my life is simpler and there are no consequences to face. Hell, if I were to get any kind of new charge, the authorities(as much as I hate to call them that) would send me right back to jail. Just by listening to people at meetings, my sponsor, and using all the things I've learned over the years I am free and cleaned and I had the best Friday and Saturday I could ask for. The were productive both recovery and getting things accomplished around my house wise. I don't know about you but for me at this time in my life, that is very important. Shit, I'm even tryin to quit smoking cigaretts. We'll see how that goes but as for everything else I've got another couple days clean and feel great...So until next time ya'll stay well and take care. Peace "Recovering" Ron

What My Addictions Were..

You know that I've been trying to tell you some of the things I do as a program of recovery but I never got into what my addictions were. I'm actually working on my personal story to post but until then this is just a very brief description of my situations. I began with pot and alcohol while in high school. After graduating I started experimenting with all the other things. first i tried some coke which was awesome but then I found crank (meth) which was cheaper and lasted much longer. Used this for years until I ended up switching to coke. This became my drug of choice. For years it was a weekend thing but as time went on it became daily and got much more involved. All during this time I also tried all the other things such as, all kinds of pills, acid, heroin, crack, and pretty much anything that was new but I always ended back with the cocaine. Once the coke started getting crappy I went to the crack and was pretty much addicted instantly. I would do it every day, all day. Finally started to have to deal it to support my own habit only becoming my own best customer. Pretty much lost everything I had except my house, and had credit card bills that were all maxed out and were astronomical. This is when I went to my first rehab. I learned a lot about myself and thought I was cured but I was only fooling myself. About a month or so late i ended up going back to the way I was. I lost a great paying job by quitting just to save face and two weeks later, that's when I got busted. Spent 2 weeks in jail and was sentenced to 18 months probation. Well once again I thought I was above evrything and started using the crack again right back where I left off. Had 3 hot piss tests but I ran away to another rehab so I didn't have to go to jail but after being home only a month I got nailed with another hot and off to jail I went. This time I was re-sentenced to 5 to 23 months in jail. Got out after about 100 days because I had some time already served but this is where I realized my life had to change. I really fucking hate being locked up and that pretty much brings us to the present. It's not easy but I've found that my life is WAY better this way than the other life I had. Like I've said before, I'm pretty young in my sobriety and clean time but my life has much more meaning. On the 24th of July I and will actually celebrate 6 months of total abstinence and have no intentions of looking back. So for now, as i stated, this is just a brief history of my downward spiral into addiction. I hope that if you are interested you will read my story when it's complete. I will let everyone know when it's done. Until next post may everyone have a clean a and sober life
Goodnight..... "Recovering" Ron

It's Been A Good Week

Hello Folks;
Hope everyone is doing well. I know that I am. It's been a trying week but I survived. It had its ups and downs but I stayed positive and it was well worth it. Still CLEAN. I guess now is as good a time as ever to start getting into some of the other things I do as my program of recovery. One of the first and most important things I do or use is have a sponsor who has a lot of years sobriety. This is a necessity for me. He's the one I go to when I need help to get through the tough times and ask for help. We get together every Wednesday morning and go over the things that I work on. We use the NA work book which I feel is an awesome way to work the steps. It really helps you to look at yourself and see where you've been. For me, this is the 2nd time I'm starting this work but since I've been to jail, we are working it much slower and I ask many more questions such as the way I feel and the thoughts that I get. He always makes me see the right way to get through but not without thinking it through. Believe me, it's no free ride. When I went to jail, man was he PISSED!!! I'm really just lucky to get him back. No wonder his nickname is "mad dog". I don't blame him for being mad either because he doesn't need to waste his time if I'm just gonna throw it away. One of the things I've learned through all the bullshit is honesty, and also a word he will not let me forget,"CONSEQUENCES". That word is pounded into me and it should be, because my consequences are now to great to fuck it up. I HATE JAIL!!! So for now this is just the tip of the iceberg for how I work my recovery daily. So for now it's getting late for me so I hope to be posting more this week and go more in depth with this. I hope everyone has a good and clean week ahead and talk to you ASAP. L8R. 'Recovering" Ron

Been Awhile

Whasup;
I know it's been awhile since my last post but I'm still goin strong. Just got real busy over the holiday weekend. By the was I hope everyone had a safe and pleasant 4th of July. To tell you the truth, this was my first one's clean in many many years. Believe me when I say that I made it through,it wasn't all candy and roses. All those demons were there wanting me to party, but it's getting much easier to stay on the path I'm on and the next day I can actually realize how easy it was. I pretty much make mountains out of mole hills so to speak. I got things done plus I actually had to work on Saturday which really pissed me off but you know what. It's over now and I survived. Imagine that. Something so simple. Right now I'm working on my personal story to post so that takes a lot of time since I'm just a hunt and peck typer. Hell these post take me a 1/2 hr. to do. Thank God for spell check or you probably wouldn't even understand what I'm typing. So until next post, everyone have a great life and stay clean.
"Recovering" Ron

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